Nowadays, dating after 50 is not that different from dating in your thirties, except for a few details. We’ve gathered essential tips and advice on how to use dating sites for people over 50.
Going online when you are over 50: is it easy
If you haven’t been dating for a while, online dating over 50 can be intimidating. There are hundreds of apps and websites out there and choosing the right one is not an easy task. Besides, once you decide to take things offline, you need to pluck up all your courage and leave your prejudice at home. Here’s the first trick: if you choose the right partner, all the nervousness disappears by itself. And if you get the wrong one, well, there is no need to impress them anyway! I’ve come across a bunch of dating sites for 50+ that were as simple and as exciting as the ones for the younger audience, so it’s definitely worth trying!
Why online dating over 50 doesn’t work sometimes: top reasons
There are over 8000 dating platforms worldwide, including 50 plus dating sites, and there is always a new app popping out once in a while. How we even used to meet each other before we went online? Dating through the data becomes the number one option to meet people.
Let’s go through the main reasons why online dating doesn’t work sometimes.
Filters and old pictures are a no-go
Face filters got a lot of people into trouble. People upload photos that look nothing like them, and then when you meet them in real life, they seem to be a totally different person. With 50+ dating, there is another popular decoy: people sometimes upload photos when they were ten or twenty younger. Some of us genuinely believe that nothing changed, so why not upload a picture when you look at your finest? That logic won’t get you far. Be honest with your future date and, most importantly, with yourself. Invest in a few good pictures of your recent gorgeous self.
The profile is not the actual person
This one everybody should keep mind. You can create a profile and put below in the “About Me” section anything you can think of — and some people put false or exaggerated information. The profile is the tiny bit on the surface of anything else the person is. In real life, we’re all different and more complex.
Algorithms don’t always work
Otherwise, it would be too easy. The algorithms are not flawless. Meaning, there is no guarantee that the person you matched with will like you or the other way around. They match you with the possibilities, but the rest is in the hands of two strangers. Just like in real life.
It is hard to be the best version of ourselves when we date
There is a lot of mental pressure involved. When you meet someone online, you can be the most confident version of yourself. As long as you are behind the screen of your laptop or your phone, being brave is easy. Once you arrange the date face-to-face, even if you’re dating at 50, it could be too overwhelming and terrifying.
Fakes and scammers
It is common that dating sites, and 50 and over dating sites are no exception, have fake profiles and scammers. Some have just a small percentage of 5% or 7% fraudulent profiles when other dating apps have over 40%. This is why it is important to be aware, keep yourself safe, and listen to your common sense. Often, dating websites have Online security guidelines, that explain how to spot the fake profile and handle yourself when dating online.
How to avoid mistakes
We all make mistakes but it’s always better to learn from the mistakes of the others. Here’s what I’ve learned while using some of the best dating sites for seniors over 50.
If filters don’t work stop filtering
Now you should learn not to see a potential match right away in every person you meet online. And most importantly, don’t trust everything you see in the beginning while you are online. It is okay to take it slow and don’t push the limits.
Try not to consider online dating an actual dating, at least for now. Instead, look at it more like a club with the same interests that has cute people in it.
Take it easy
The less you think about perfection, the easier it is to notice one. Share conversation and the same interests first and see how the thing will go after that. Remember, the process of fining your significant other is as exciting as the final prize. Embrace and enjoy it!
Avoid the cheapskates
The good 50 plus dating site usually isn’t free or cheap. It won’t hurt to spend some money on a good and modern dating app rather than going to the cheap one with a bunch of scammers that will mess with your head and present you the worst experience. Don’t do that to yourself. It is better to invest.
Meet the profile but talk to the person behind it
Even if a profile looks like the most adorable thing you have ever seen in your life, it means nothing. To get to know the person behind it, you should start the conversation, and here’s where the human factor will appear. You will either like the person and would continue talking or unmatch and move forward without wasting your time. Don’t have high expectations and you won’t get disappointed.
Always be safe
Even the best dating sites for over 50 can’t guarantee you a one hundred percent scammers-free zone. No fake account or a scammer can take advantage of you if you know how to act when you are out there, dating online. Don’t share too much personal information right away, and if you decide to meet offline, pick up the public place.
50 great tips for dating over 50
Follow these tips to get back out there with no time.
1. Embrace rejections
Dating women and men over 50 do not mean that you’ll get a green light on every date that you go to. Chances are, you’ll deal with rejections. No one likes rejection, but try not to take it personally if that happened to you. Just look at it as a part of the way that should be done.
2. Expand your usual age limits
If you’ve been single for a while and you cannot understand where you’re going wrong, it’s time to try something new. You can choose someone younger or older than you are, and most likely, nobody will judge you for that. Even if you go with more than a 10 years difference, it’s okay.
3. Ease into talking about sensitive subjects
Even if this match seems to be your soulmate from the first sight, don’t get too comfortable right away. Try to be careful with sensitive topics, like why did you and your spouse got divorced or the cause of death if the person is a widow. We don’t know what each of us is going through inside.
4. Don’t be afraid to make your needs known
The best part of online dating is that you don’t need to pretend. You can be as open as you want and finally feel that freedom. If you have certain needs in bed or casual dating, don’t hide them, but instead, embrace it all.
5. Embrace your age
Together with your needs, you have to be comfortable with your age. This decade lost the uncomfortable feeling of shame. Don’t lie about your age just to please someone. Using dating sites for 50+ will put you into a comfortable atmosphere.
6. Listen attentively
When you’re dating over 50, it’s ok that you haven’t been on a real date for a very long time. And dating is a skill that we all can forget. Even though the first date brings you lots of excitement, try not to overdo it. Otherwise, you can end up talking the whole evening about yourself instead of having a proper first date conversation.
7. Don’t expect things to be the same as when you were 20
Remember that you are who you are, but don’t expect things to be like it was before. Nothing is the same anymore. The dating scene has changed a lot and the best thing that you can do is adjust to it. Now it is more common to talk online more than offline, flowers are not that popular anymore, and sex on the first date is more acceptable than ever.
8. Avoid filters and use recent photos
Remember the filter part where you should lose them? We will remind you once again. It is better to use the pictures made recently. Don’t upload pics where you are 10 or 15 years younger. Avoid filters and learn to love you as you are.
9. Send a few flirty texts
There is no harm to start flirting online. Just try it. Even simple “Hey handsome” or “ Hey gorgeous” will do the work. Don’t treat online dating over 50 as a challenge, it is a fun experience.
10. Ask someone out — even if you’ve never done it before
The caption says everything for itself. The time has changed, and now you don’t have to wait around till someone asks you out. Be bold and go for it yourself.
11. Try an age-specific dating site
The market is filled with online platforms, and a lot of them are different, featuring all kinds of people, preferences, and age groups. It is better to at least start with free online dating over 50, where the majority of users are the same age as you are. That will smooth your first experience. Once you feel comfortable with your online dating game, you can try the mainstream apps as well.
12. Forget about the past
The past is in the past, and we cannot change it. Instead, embrace what you have and where are you in your life. That also means leaving your previous relationships in the past as well. The present is an exciting moment to be in.
13. Master a skillful compliment
Try to come up with a unique and chic compliment and use it. You can complement whatever it is but make it counts. For instance, compliment their brown eyes, saying they are like honey on a sunny day. If you’re out of ideas, look for pick up lines on the web.
14. Don’t do it if you don’t feel it
If for some reason you are not comfortable using the 50 plus dating site, it is fine. You can always ask a friend to set you up on a date with someone. Sign up for a yoga class or take pottery lessons. Be open to new possibilities and you’ll attract them in your life.
15. Put together new outfits
Go shopping and treat yourself with something new and cute for your upcoming date. Try to buy a new jacket, shirt or blouse that will flatter you.
16. Get some dating over 50 advice from friends who’ve started dating again
Over 50 dating can be overwhelming, so find a friend who has been out there before you and ask them for advice. Let them break it down for you, so they help you get rid of the insecurities and mistakes that can come up on the first dates.
17. Get to know each other before meeting in person
Probably the best part of online dating over 50 or any online dating is that you can have some time talking through the screens of your devices before you meet the person in real life. It will help you to get to know each other better and melt the ice a little bit before the actual first date.
18. Go Dutch
Offer to split the bill, it is a common thing to do nowadays. Even if you’re old-fashioned, it doesn’t mean that everyone who’s dating over 50 is the same. Don’t get offended, express your principles instead. And prepare to compromise.
19. Be patient
If your profile and the message box isn’t full of likes and compliments, it is okay. Give it some time.
20. Never trash talk your ex
We wouldn’t even suggest talking about your exes, but if the topic will come up, it is important to stay civil about your ex. Be the bigger person, but don’t overdo it either.
21. Respond to messages in a timely manner
You don’t have to worry about answering all the texts right away, but if you are not out there responding in a few days, that means you are not that interested after all. Approximate a few hours apart won’t hurt. Although, if the conversation is getting interesting, don’t leave another person hanging for a couple of hours. In that case, try to stay online to finish the conversation properly.
22. Look up your prospective dates online before meeting
To avoid scams, if you have a feeling that the profile and the person behind it seem odd, google their pictures, find their social media, and trust your gut.
23. Talk yourself up online
Stay as positive as possible. No one likes grumpy people. Don’t start harsh topics that might involve politics or high prices at the stores. Avoid being annoyed by not that sunny weather or that your knee hurts every time it’s raining. You came out on a date, be open and free but make a good first impression by being a happy person.
24. Don’t divulge any private or sensitive information
Don’t give out money to strangers you meet online. They might talk to you for a while, and then all of a sudden, they have some emergency, and they need financial help. People with real financial troubles and emergencies normally don’t ask strangers on the dating sites for help. Stay away from scammers, ban and report them.
25. Have your first date somewhere public
To avoid catfishing, always arrange your first date in a public place. Choose a chill bar or a restaurant where you can also get the quiet space for a private conversation. And if the person looks nothing like their pictures and you’re not comfortable with that, it is ok to walk away.
26. Let someone know where you’ll be going
Another essential safety measure is to tell someone close where and with whom you are going.
27. Try a new hobby
If you have no luck with dating sites for 50+, you could also try out new activities. Not only will you meet new people, but get new experiences to talk about with your next future date.
28. Practice your flirting IRL
If it has been a while or your flirting never was the top game for you, it is normal to practice with someone. It can be an online stranger or your friend. The choice is yours.
29. Take more solo adventures
Once you are comfortable with yourself, you will find someone new. One of the greatest things you can do is to pack your bag and go somewhere for vacation. Being by yourself will push you to meet new people and get out of your comfort zone.
30. Make eye contact
Eye contact is a bold and flirting move number one. If you don’t know how to make one — practice with a mirror or with a friend. But, as practice shows, if you really likes someone, it will come naturally.
31. Don’t push it
It is okay to take things slow. It is not a race and you don’t need to move in together and get married right away. This is your time and your life — spend it with quality.
32. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket
It is okay to have multiple first dates and to see other people before you both decide that you are ready for the next step.
33. Try dating outside your “type”
When you are over 50, you certainly do have your type. Now try other things and go for different people. We are sure you are going to enjoy it.
34. Don’t try to sound too young on your dating profile
Be realistic about your age and how mature you are. Don’t try to be someone else when putting information in your bio.
35. Be honest
Don’t trash your ex, but be honest with your future partner why things didn’t work out for you before. Just don’t make it the theme of the date.
36. Listen to those gut instincts
Intuition is a strong feeling. If something feels off — listen to it and let it go.
37. Don’t assume that younger or older people who are interested in you have an agenda
This is where you have to relax and enjoy the dating process. Don’t overthink it.
38. Protect yourself
Once you are in intimate relationships again, you should be aware of your health and be careful. Sex feels good, but you need to take care of your health too. Always use condoms, lube, and don’t break your back with it.
39. Don’t assume that marriage and kids are off the table
Look at the celebrities who are starting their families when they are 50+. If they can do it, you can do it too. Don’t sweep the idea under the rag just yet.
40. Allow yourself to have fun
One night stands are also fun when you’re dating people over 50.
41. Try not to compare your new relationship with your previous ones
Here is where anyone can get stuck at any age. Comparing won’t do good. Understand that all people are different, and so are the relationships.
42. Cast expectations aside
You can meet a lot of mental walls on why you shouldn’t try dating again but try to calm down and put those reasons aside.
43. Don’t be surprised if you get a little giddy
You feel that rush again. Goosebumps are all over your skin. It is absolutely normal. Age doesn’t matter here.
44. Don’t immediately introduce your date to friends and family
Keep your private life private for a little longer. You can mention your new relationship to your family, but don’t drag them to the family occasions right away. Give it time.
45. Don’t downplay your accomplishments
You lived a life, and you accomplished things. Be proud of that and don’t feel ashamed to share it. You deserve it.
46. Don’t ditch your standards
Don’t lower your standards just because you feel lonely.
47. Ask them out again if you had a good time
If you had a good time together, why hesitate, ask them out again! Be straightforward, take their number or say something at the end of the date. And since you’ve met online, you can text something the same evening after you get home. It is definitely a nice gesture.
48. Get back in touch the day after your date
Don’t give yourself a week to get back to them after the date. If it was good and you want to continue, show your interest, and text them the next day.
49. But don’t feel obligated
If you don’t share the excitement as the other person on the date — it is okay. You don’t have to go on the second date so you won’t “offend” them. It is okay to say “no.”
50. Enjoy the journey
No matter what you choose: the best dating sites for people over 50 or just an old school way of meeting people offline, focus on having fun. You should put yourself out there and explore.
Over 50 dating: how we work
Pure is the platform where you can meet people over 50. It was designed to find people online and then move offline to the real talking face-to-face as soon as possible.
To register, you need to provide your valid email and one photo. The intelligent matching algorithm will connect you with like-minded people in your area. Once you like each other and start to best adult snapchat, you will have one hour to talk and arrange a real meetup.
In case something goes wrong, you can leave the conversation. After one hour, all the chats are automatically deleted. This way, no one will bother you after you stop talking to them.
Since Pure doesn’t require you to provide any of your social media links, you can be sure that your personal information won’t be at risk. We also suggest not to share your information with a stranger you meet online right away.
The pool with over 400,000 active users will keep you busy and entertained. You can meet people that are from different social circles that you would have never met otherwise, same as people who have the same interests as you.
Pure is for real meetings, not endless chats online
Pure users have only an hour to chat before their profiles disappear. In one hour, you send a casual sex request to potential matches near your location, discuss your desires, and share contact detail to set up an offline date. If you want to repeat the search and find other matches, you have to create a new profile. No worries, it takes a minute.
What is the best dating site for over 50?
The best dating sites for over 50 are SilverSingles, Pure, and EliteSingles.
Which dating sites are completely free?
OkCupid, Happn, and Tinder are free to use with all the main features.
Is eHarmony good for 50-year-olds?
Yes, you can find people who are 50+.
Is Bumble for over 50?
Yes, you can use Bumble when you are dating over 50.
Do 50-year-olds use Tinder?
Yes, but the pool of choice can be way smaller.