DATING TIPS

How to give a perfect handjob

0

The handjob is underrated, both by women and men. Some claim it’s a waste of time — who needs hands when you have other ways of satisfaction? But see, handjob doesn’t have to be mutual masturbation if you know how to do it.

Handjob helps you get an idea about the partner’s penis, know what gets him on, and turns him off. It’s how you know what to expect during so-called actual sex. Here’s my guide on how to give a handjob that will be a memorable experience on its own for both of you.

Hand jobs can deliver amazing intimate experiences if you do it right

Reasons to give a hand job

If you aren’t a fan of a hand job, you just haven’t given a good one yet. Anyone who practiced hand job skills will tell you that it turns men on not less than the actual sex does. But if you need some convincing, let’s see the main motivations for hand job.

You will be able to understand your partner’s sexual preferences

During vaginal and anal sex, men sometimes don’t speak out about their experiences all that much. Some guys like to seem tough and pretend to enjoy it all, even if they don’t. A hand job creates an intimate environment for communication — guys can finally discuss their favorite grip, degree of intensity, and let girls find their most erogenous zones.

Even if you are not a fan of the process of a hand job, it’s worth doing at least for understanding your man. Give him a chance to advise on how to give a man a hand job from his perspective. Also, focus on exploring him in detail, like you haven’t had a chance before.

You can regulate the degree of roughness

Some men like when girls use lubricants, whereas others prefer dry, rough hand jobs. During sex, especially with an intense position, neglecting a lube can have dangerous consequences, like vaginal bruises and penis fractures. Handjobs aren’t associated with the same risks: you can easily come in without a lube if your guy likes it rough. For more gentle experience, you can use a lot of lubricants — and again, you can regulate that.

It’s better to have lube around, just in case, but you can decide to not use it

You face no risks of sexually transmitted diseases or pregnancy

Hand jobs are safe — there is barely a possibility of transmitting an illness, and certainly, no way to get pregnant. For girls, it’s a win, especially if we are with a stranger. Sure, protection works fine, but sometimes, we want to be deadly sure.

You can incorporate into roleplays

You can incorporate them into any roles, erotic massages, with latex gloves or bare hand. You can use hand jobs to spice up any game and get into your character.

It’s an easy way to assert your dominance — girls don’t get to do that in many positions. You can quite literally hold a tight grip on him until he wants you to let go. You can also be gentle and sweet and switch between the two unexpectedly. Hand jobs keep it fresh and are a nice addition to any position or game.

How to prepare to handjob

Even though handjobs are the most simple way to have sex, we still have to be prepared. I divide my preparation into three steps, and just a word of advice, try not to skip them. This preparation was my main answer to how to give a great handjob — it all starts with us.

Preparing your hands

Hands can be sexy, too — and that’s our objective when we are learning how to give someone a hand job. The skin of your hands should be smooth and soft. Otherwise, the hand job will end up too rough and even painful. Here’s the rundown of tips for preparing your hands for the job.

  • Use moisturizing creams for softening your skin and keep it nearby.
  • Wash your hands and take care of your nails. The long manicure can be sexy, but it will likely be painful for your partner.
  • Experiment with gloves and incorporate them into roleplays.

Your hands should be pleasant to the partner’s touch. I suggest you test it out and ask your partner right away if the touch is smooth enough — before you go in deep.

Your hands should be clean, pleasant to the touch, and well-manicured

Planning the build-up

The problem is, for us, slow build-ups are the best. We love when guys start gentle touching, then move to foreplay, and if that’s all combined with dirty talk — well, that’s just awesome. The problem is, guys tend to be slightly different.

Although many men enjoy taking it slower, they are more impatient about the main action. If you want to use a hand job as a build-up, be sure to ask your partner for how long he’d like you to continue.

Good build-up keeps things interesting. You can start massaging him still in his pants and then slowly move outside. Slowly taking off your clothes will arouse him even more — use that, too.

Precum play

Some girls don’t like it when guys are pre-cumming during hand job, but really, it’s better this way. His precum provides a high-quality lube, which makes the entire experience much better. So, if your man is at this stage, you can know that that’s a perfect time to deliver an intense hand job without him getting hurt.

How to give him a hand job: the best techniques

Now you are familiar with the preparation steps, and it’s time to move to the action. Learning hand job techniques is much simpler than mastering sexual positions. You can practice them alone, and they are intuitive. Knowing these techniques will impress your partner and make you look a pro — but in reality, it’s incredibly simple.

Both guys and girls enjoy being gently scratched with the claw

The gentle claw

This handjob technique can be intense and soft at the same time. Bend your fingers and put them in a claw, similarly to cats’ paws. Instead of simply gripping him the typical way, take his penis into your “claw”. Communication is the key here — you don’t want to overdo it.

For this one, use a lot of lube, especially if you are going for intense back-and-forth movements. Try to grip him with your claw, and then let go. Repeat this several times for the effect to kick in.

Traditional with a twist

The traditional hand job is grabbing a guy’s penis, gripping him, and stroking it up and down, back and forth. This is the most boring, and perhaps the most hated way, of the handjob, especially if there is no good lube.

But you can spice this technique up and make it the highlight of your foreplay. Instead of passively stroking his penis up and down, try also rubbing your thumb in the back of his penis. While the rest of your fingers provide rough experience, the thumb gives the gentle touch.

Double-handed backhand

If using one hand for the handjob is boring for you, use both. One hand will be jerking his penis up and down, whereas another will stimulate his tip. You can massage him in small circles, slightly pinch him, if you are into rough sex, or even use your tongue for deep impact.

You can bend fingers on one hand and keep them straight on another one

The escalator

Another way of giving a guy a hand job and keep him excited is by using the escalator, a technique where your hands are always dynamic. When your right hand is at the bottom, the left one goes up. His penis is always engaged, from top to bottom. The hands will always exchange positions, and the best thing is, one hand can be rough, while another will be keeping it gentle.

Balls in play

Man’s balls are a sensitive erogenous zone, and girls often ignore them during handjobs. Don’t make this mistake, and use another hand to take care of testicles.

  • Fondling: take his testicles into your hands and massage them with your fingers;
  • Squeezing: apply some force, gradually increasing the degree of roughness;
  • Pulling: this works only for some guys, while others have a low pain threshold, so communicate.

Ultimately, a hand job leaves a lot of space for sexual experiments. You don’t have to stick to particular guides: explore him, get reactions, and talk about what he liked the most.

Tips for giving a hand job

You can make a hand job even better if you let creativity kick in. Here are my go-to tips on how to give a guy a good handjob, regardless of the technique.

Treat it seriously

Hand jobs aren’t just foreplay. A hand job will work if you treat it as sex. You need to talk about it, learn the sweetest spots, remember the best techniques, experiment with roleplay and BDSM. Whatever you do, don’t keep it boring.

Use natural lube

Using your spit or his precum during the hand job works great in most cases. Natural lubes offer smooth protection and no irritation. They are accessible and universal. So, unless your partner is absolutely against the idea of using natural fluids for lubrication, don’t be too skeptical.

Make a surprise

The key factor in a successful hand job is its spontaneity. Keep it short, sweet, and surprising. Once you are in the foreplay, taking your clothes off, it’s a perfect time to go in with your hands first. For some guys, it’s better to get a short warning, though — it depends on the personality of your partner and his taste for hand jobs in general.

You can undress before approaching him with a hand job

Do sex talking

Handjobs keep the guy’s mind free. They are so used to be active and worry about pulling out the most intense and satisfying sex that it might be weird for them to lay back and relax. Be sure to keep their minds busy with sexy roleplays, dirty talks, and graphic descriptions.

Explore sweet spots

Handjobs should stimulate all erogenous sones: penis, testicle, and prostate. For the prostate massage, you need to go in his anus and move your fingers around. Jut like girls have G spot, in their vagina, guys have a similar place in their prostate. Be sure to use lube and trim your nails — otherwise, it will be painful.

Handjob mistakes

The reason why handjob gets such a bad rep is that there are a few recurring mistakes that happen all the time. These issues are the same, and there aren’t even many, but they happen all the time. Here are the main sins of handjobs that you should avoid at all costs — otherwise, it doesn’t matter what techniques you use.

Being too rough

When girls neglect using lubes, their hands create a lot of friction on the guy’s penis, making the hand job outright intolerable. If you have nails, hand jobs might not be for you — although gloves could help. Remove your jewelry and don’t go to intensely on him.

Doing the same old thing

A lot of us get too excited when guys like something. We start coming back to the same old move over and over again until it loses all of its effects. The sex is no fun, and we just wasted a perfectly lovely technique. Don’t ever use the same method more than two times in a row. Always look for new ways to satisfy your partner.

Still, you definitely should pay attention to his reactions and feedback

Being focused only on his penis

We discussed that you need to engage his balls and prostate, too. You have to explore all his erogenous zones — it’s one of the main reasons for doing a handjob to begin with. Otherwise, it’s just not enjoyable, and the handjob loses its crucial advantages.

Not listening to your partner

Guys have been there by themselves. They know their penises much better than you could ever hope. Use that to your advantage, and don’t be shy to ask their tips. Talk if he likes it gentle and rough, how much lube you would need, and what’s the preferred pace. If he’s uncomfortable at first, you can use a bit of alcohol to let some loose.

Download Pure, a unique application for safe dating and one of the best Craigslist Personals alternatives.

I am:

Looking for:

My email:

Find a guy for practice in Pure

In Pure, the algorithm will delete your account an hour after you start searching for a partner. If you match, you have another hour to talk in the chat — then it will also be automatically deleted. This makes the service inaccessible and uninteresting for bots, fakes, and crooks. Pure users are alive personalities who do not hide their desires and want to find a partner in the next hour.

What guys think about hand jobs

The best way to practice hand jobs is to ask men on how to give a handjob to a guy. To get their opinions, I went to AskMen on Reddit, and here’s what they think on handjobs.

“I’ll take a legitimate handjob where that’s the main focus, but I’ll pass on a lazy hand mashing of my junk.”

“Depends. Are we talking about a handjob where your partner is in the moment, seeking out your spots, and making your eyes roll up in the back of your head? Or are we talking about a handjob while she watches Ancient Aliens and takes about the bills she paid that day?”

“Love it. I know people say they can do it better on their own, but I always enjoy the experience of giving my GF control. I always feel like it’s a more powerful orgasm, and I tend to stop once I orgasm because of the intensity, whereas she’ll keep going. Not to mention, doing it while she’s pressed up against me with her lips locked on mine makes it all the better.”

“It can actually be a very intimate moment. Once a friend was giving me one while I was caressing her (both of us naked), and we had a really nice conversation, and she told me she never had such an intimate and wholesome experience.”

A video guide to handjobs

If you want to see some techniques in action, I suggest taking a look at this video with a step-by-step demonstration of handjob preparation and methods.

The bottom line

Hand jobs are great for getting to know your partner and creating an intimate experience before you go into intense sex. You can try out different roles, both dominant and submissive, engage in dirty talks, and add it to roleplays.

Learning to give a handjob doesn’t require much effort or practice — as long as you remember the basic rules and pay attention to what the guy has to say, you will both love the process.

FAQ

Can you describe your first handjob experience?

For most women, first handjob experience is stressful, because they are worried they can do it better than a guy would himself. However, this hesitation quickly passes — guys love letting girls go down there, as long as they listen to their preferences. For many guys, it’s an intimate moment that can be combined with deep conversations and playful moments.

How to give a good hand job?

You need to talk to the guy about his best spots and learn what excites him more. Don’t be lazy about this — just like sex, hand jobs require girls to be present and confident. Also, watch the way you talk — guys don’t like it when their partners discuss routine stuff while doing the same repetitive motions. Treat it as a ritual, not as a burden or sex substitution.

How do you do a hand job?

Use lubricants and prepare your hands before gripping your guy’s private parts. Also, don’t make a mistake of being focused on the penis only — massaging balls and prostate improves the experience.

The best handjobs start with preparation. You need to wash and moisturize your hands — this way, they will smoothly enter and be very nice to the touch. Some guys, however, exactly enjoy this rough feeling, so it’s a matter of personal preferences. Either way, you don’t want to do a handjob with dirty hands or long nails — this leads to inevitable penile damage and infections.

What are the best techniques for giving a man a handjob?

You can experiment with different massage techniques and incorporate BDSM-elements. Pulling and gripping your boyfriend are classical methods, but you can also try something less tried-and-proven, like twisting his balls.

Jennifer Williams
Has sexy British accent and sense of humor. Graduated as a psychologist, and worked as a copywriter for advertising. From the age of 20, Jennifer has been writing a diary to document her sexual discoveries, and later focused on writing articles about sex, relationships and dating. Loves coffee and collects sex toys.

The full rough sex guide for her: ideas, positions, tips

Previous article

Full guide on how to make yourself squirt on your own and during sex

Next article

You may also like

Comments

Leave a reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

More in DATING TIPS